scripsi

Title: Susan, Once Queen of Narnia, Always Queen of Narnia
Fandom: Piranesi, The Chronicles of Narnia
Rating: All Ages
Word Count: 1752
Characters: Piranesi, Susan Pevensie
Warnings: Major Character Death
Summary: Piranesi meets an old woman in the House.
AN: This fic originated when I read a Yuletide letter wishing for a crossover where Piranesi meets Susan in the House. I loved this idea, and I had basically the whole fic mapped out in a few minutes after reading the letter. Unfortunately, my idea managed to include a DNW, so it couldn't be a treat and is thus posted outside Yuletide.

The fic on AO3.

Meeting a stranger in the House
ENTRY FOR 1 NOVEMBER 2019

Today I found an old woman in the House. It was very unexpected. She was standing in front of the faun, very still, and for a moment I thought the House had given me a new stature. It may sound strange, but she was dressed in several layers of colourless clothes, beige and light grey, and on top of it all a snow-white shawl knitted so it looked like intricate lace. Her hair was white too, worn in a long braid wound around her head. Her face was pale; almost as pale as her hair, and beautiful. I don’t mean she looked young; her face was very wrinkled, and the skin looked very thin and almost translucent. It reminded me of white tissue paper which had been scrunched together and then imperfectly been smoothed out again.

With her being so still, it was a slight shock when she turned her head to look at me. Her eyes were not faded as old people’s eyes often seem to become, but a vivid dark blue. It was a very direct look, and she didn’t seem either surprised or scared to see me.

“Hello,”, she said and turned back to watch the faun again. After a minute she spoke again. “I knew a faun once. He was my sister’s best friend, but I was very fond of him too, very fond. This statue looks very much like him.”

I didn’t know what to say about that, so I just nodded toward the faun. “He has always been my favourite of all the statues here.”

“I’ve noticed there are a great deal of them. It’s an interesting place. I was trying to find my way to somewhere quite different, but I ended up here instead. Does it have a name?”

“I call it the House.”

The old woman surprised me by not asking me to explain the House. “And what do I call you?”

“When I lived here, I was called Piranesi. When I’m not here, I’m called Matthew Rose Sorenson.”

She gave me a shrewd glance. “But none of those feels like your proper name, do they?. Who are you when you think of yourself?”

Somehow it was very easy to answer with the name I use when I think of myself. “I’m the Beloved Child of the House.”

“I’m called Susan or Miss Pevensie. They are, of course, both my names, but in my heart, I’m always Queen Susan.”

She blushed a little when she said it and raised her chin as if she expected me to think she was ridiculous or trying to put on airs. But I looked at her erect figure and the quiet dignity she emanated and felt it was just the right thing to call her.

“It suits you.”

She looked pleased. “Thank you.”

We were both quiet for a few minutes before she spoke again.

“So you used to live here? Why don’t you anymore?”

“If you stay here for too long, you forget who you are.”

“For some that would be considered a blessing. When you have lived as long as I have, there are a lot of things you might want to forget.”

I felt a little worried. “You do know how to go back, don’t you?”

“Oh yes. There is no need to worry, young man. Lovely as this place is, there’s a distinct lack of restrooms and coffee. I just enjoy taking a walk here now and then.”

Queen Susan went back to study the faun for such a long time I wondered if she wished me to go away. But just as I was about to say my farewell, she started talking again.

“Do you have any sisters or brothers?”

“Yes, two sisters.”

“Are you close?”

“We might have been, once. We kind of lost each other. Or perhaps I should say I lost them.”

“I lost my family too. There was a terrible accident when I was still quite young, and in one stroke everyone I loved was gone. My sister, my two brothers, my parents. Everyone. Somehow I never got around to find a new family after that.”

She seemed so sad I didn’t know what to say. What an awful thing to lose so much at once. But then I thought of my family who I don’t remember though they are still around, and for the first time, I wondered if it was possible for us to get unlost and if I could feel I belonged with them again. The silence which followed felt awkward, but I had an odd feeling I needed to show her something.

“Of all the statues you have seen here, which one is your favourite?”

She contemplated the question and then shook her head. “I don’t think I have found it yet. I’ve seen many lovely and strange ones, but not the one I like above everyone else.

“Of course, dear. It would be interesting to see.”

The statue I had in mind is not very far from the faun, but Queen Susan walked very slowly and often stopped to look at statues that interested her. I didn’t mind; I found her a restful company, and I had nowhere to hurry to.

“You know,” she said after a pause where she exclaimed over a doorway which looked like two trees had grown up side by side and entwined their branches to form a portal. “A long time ago I heard about a place which seems quite similar to this House.”

“Oh?”

“It wasn’t a house like this, but a place filled with trees and small pools of water. Each and every pool would take you to different worlds, but this place wasn’t a real world but a place in between them. It had no past and no future, and if you stayed there too long, you forgot everything about yourself and where you came from. I wonder if this isn’t a place in between as well.”

“You can only get to one world from here.”

“Are you sure?”

I wasn’t, of course, and for a while, we walked in silence while I was thinking of this new possibility. I’m not sure I liked the idea, but it certainly merited to be analysed and thought about. If, as Queen Susan said, there were more worlds out there- what was there too said the House couldn’t open up to them as well? Perhaps I had never found them because I had never looked.

None of us said anything else until we reached the chamber I had in mind. It’s not very large, and it doesn’t lead to any other rooms or halls, so you have to go there on purpose. It has several animal statues, most of them slightly bigger than their living counterparts, and many of them are standing on their hind legs. By the one I was thinking about is lying down. It’s an enormous lion, whose quiet majesty has always filled me with awe. He is posed like the lions around Nelson at Trafalgar Square, but where they stare straight ahead, this lion is bending its head in profound and heartbreaking grief.

Before I had time to point it out, Queen Susan stopped and pointed at it. “It’s this one!”

Her voice wavered a little, and her eyes suddenly filled with tears. She walked up to it and stretched out her hand and tenderly placed it on the lion’s mane. Then she looked back at me and smiled.

“You know, I think you are more than a child of this House. I think you may be its guide.”

I thought of showing the House’s wonder to Raphael and bring James back, and I wondered if she might be right. Another one of those things I needed to think about. Meanwhile, Queen Susan walked back to me.

“It’s been lovely meeting you, but if you don’t mind, I would like to be here alone for a bit.”

“Are you sure you can find your way back alone?”

“Don’t worry. I can find my way home, I’m sure.”

I took my farewell and left her standing by the lion, but I didn’t feel completely at ease and decided I would go back the next day.

Meeting Queen Susan again
ENTRY FOR 2 NOVEMBER 2019

As I had already decided, I went back to the lion again today. And as I half expected, Queen Susan was still there, curled up between the lion’s mighty paws. I realised I had been wrong when I thought the lion was grieving. Now I saw he had bowed his head to gaze down on the charge resting between his legs, and what I had taken for sorrow was instead joyous love.

At first, I thought Queen Susan was merely sleeping with her shawl wrapped around her, but she didn’t stir when I approached. I wasn’t surprised when I touched her and her body was still and cold, and her eyes looked at nothing anymore. She looked happy. Until now I hadn’t realised she never once smiled when we talked yesterday. Now her lips curled into a welcoming smile as if the last thing she had seen was a dear friend.

I’m writing this sitting on the floor a bit from Susan and the lion. I feel a little sad because I would have liked to talk with her some more. She’s the first person I’ve met who has been to other worlds than the House, and it would have been interesting to learn more. And perhaps it would have made me understand the House better. But I think Queen Susan found the path she was looking for in the end, and who am I to begrudge her?

In a little while, I’m going to find one of my nets and carry her down to the sea. When her bones are clean and white, I will wrap them into her shawl and take her back to the lion. Raphael will not be pleased; I’m sure she will argue it would be better to take Susan’s body back. But I don’t think so. She told me she knew how to get back, and I’m sure she would have if she had wanted to. I’m sure I will get Raphael to see it my way in the end.

And Queen Susan will rest in the loving gaze of the lion forever, and I think they are both happy about it.